Arfur Dealy

Pet hates...What really bugs you....

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Women calling up and asking has the cambelt been done, no its got a chain , whats a chain so why the belt not been done.

Had a lady yesterday Zuto client all she had to do was call them i had already invoiced zuto they where just going to ping the money.

The car was a 2011 a3 audi cab one owner full audi history. 61,000 miles .

she walked away because of the cambelt ,car was super cheap .

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Traders who when you turn up cannot remember what they phoned you for, or they know the car and it is off site or the keys lost. Sometimes business would be great if you did not have to have customers.

Managers who cannot be bothered to come out of the office and just tell you to do what needs doing, mind you sometimes that can be a good one.

Traders who use rubbish suppliers but will not change to a quality one.

Traders who take the word of their cherry picking dent guy, get a second opinion before you shove it off to the bodyshop. I know of dealers who use a guy who will not do swage lines, arches or anything that will take more than 5 minutes.

Traders who use a replacement company to do repairs, they seldom do quality. Note the word seldom there as there are a few exceptions as some of my customers are replacement companies who have sent staff hee for training.

In truth though, this has been a great trade for me now for over 47 years, still get a buzz every day and most of my good pals are dealers or ex dealers.

Keep smiling.

 

 

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People who call up 9 or 10 times whilst you cant get to phone or are on another call and its first thing in the morning on a Sunday and its to view a car weds/thursdsay  just seeing if its still there.... 

 

People who bring cars back for a list of warranty items on the day before the warranty expires.

 

 

People who call about a car and then ask where we are... next question how far is that from London 

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Why's the miles so low.

is it reliable .

Punter starting it up from cold and revving the nuts out of it .

There's a bit of water coming out of exhaust ... head gaskets gone .

test drives.

people that smell.

Manchester Utd ... and Spurs at the moment.

children.

small dogs that constantly yap.

Joe Swash.

 

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Q; Is this car still for sale ? A ;; Its on the web site isnt it ? 

Q; Has this car  got service history ? A;; Just a minute I'll get the advert up and read it to you . 

Q " do you know what petrol its had in it " :o A;; I need a crystal ball for that question , 

Q; How old was the last owner ? .A ; same age as you :rolleyes:

Q; will you put 4 new tyres on ? 5 mm all round :oA ; That will be £450 extra then :rolleyes: he lost interest in tyres at that point 

Q; does your warranty cover everything ?, No its yours to look after .

Q; it has a stone chip on the bumper ?, I left that there so you had something to moan about 

Q; Got to ask the wife A; Don't rush cos I've got ask my mum if i can sell it :rolleyes:

 

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The 1s that coming looking at buying a car at £2500 but all of a sudden they see a £6000 car on site, errmm do you have keys for that 1, no its been sold 

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"Thank you for your time"

"It's the first one we've looked at"

"I've been looking for 9 months now and I WILL know when I see the RIGHT car"

"Thank you for your time again"

"Oh, it's been sold. How much did you sell it for"

"I can't put a deposit down but if someone wants to buy it can you call me?"

"We are looking for our daughter. She doesn't know what she wants"

"This is a great car, thank you for showing it to us. We only wish it was black, not white, automatic, not manual, diesel not petrol and it was closer to our £7K budget instead of the £10900 asking price. We'll think about it and will let you know, at least now we know where you are"

"Many thanks for your time!"

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Customers who already come in with an attitude despite the fact you've never met them.

Years ago when I started at a main dealer I had a couple come in looking at cars she was nice chatty, he was just a dick hands in pockets 1 word answers just being awkward being young I was a bit flustered so told my manager not sure how to deal with this.

Manager went straight over to them introduced himself and asked the fella if he had every had a bad sales experience with us before.... the fella said no.. manager replied well your gonna f**king get one if you carry one with that attitude with my sales people.

his wife just burst out laughing and said he deserved that ha.

 

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"I don't need / want to pay to have it diagnosed, 'xxxxxx' has already done that and we know what's wrong with it"

"Well fuck off and fix it yourself then"

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1 hour ago, Dave2302 said:

"I don't need / want to pay to have it diagnosed, 'xxxxxx' has already done that and we know what's wrong with it"

"Well fuck off and fix it yourself then"

We just love them sort , "me mates a specialist ":lol: e got vag com and e sez its code !!!!!! :angry: Same here we tell then to go forth and multiply and get yer mate to get his spanners out :D

Iv'e bought the stuff to do it mate , "can yer just fit this , NO :angry:"

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3 hours ago, Tony911 said:

The 1s that coming looking at buying a car at £2500 but all of a sudden they see a £6000 car on site, errmm do you have keys for that 1, no its been sold 

3 hours ago, Tony911 said:

 

3 hours ago, Tony911 said:

 

How wrong are we! Just had a family come to view a golf for £2800 straight away the wife was like i love that seat leon fr. How much is it £4500 ok lets go for a drive, soon as the doors opened husband had no choice it was going home with her. Lol

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4 hours ago, Dan W said:

Customers who already come in with an attitude despite the fact you've never met them.

Years ago when I started at a main dealer I had a couple come in looking at cars she was nice chatty, he was just a dick hands in pockets 1 word answers just being awkward being young I was a bit flustered so told my manager not sure how to deal with this.

Manager went straight over to them introduced himself and asked the fella if he had every had a bad sales experience with us before.... the fella said no.. manager replied well your gonna f**king get one if you carry one with that attitude with my sales people.

his wife just burst out laughing and said he deserved that ha.

 

like

3 hours ago, Dave2302 said:

"I don't need / want to pay to have it diagnosed, 'xxxxxx' has already done that and we know what's wrong with it"

"Well fuck off and fix it yourself then"

like

1 hour ago, Tony911 said:

How wrong are we! Just had a family come to view a golf for £2800 straight away the wife was like i love that seat leon fr. How much is it £4500 ok lets go for a drive, soon as the doors opened husband had no choice it was going home with her. Lol

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2 hours ago, David Horgan said:

Iv'e bought the stuff to do it mate , "can yer just fit this , NO :angry:"

Hell yeah.........................

" Fuck right off and fit your own Chinese EBay shite, I'm running a Business not a Charity, and I guarantee my Parts and Labour !! "

8 minutes ago, Arfur Dealy said:

How wrong are we! Just had a family come to view a golf for £2800 straight away the wife was like i love that seat leon fr. How much is it £4500 ok lets go for a drive, soon as the doors opened husband had no choice it was going home with her. Lol

/\ /\ /\  That is exactly how we ended up with the 2017 E Class, I only went into MB Parts Dept, came out, Mel's sat in it !! Luckily I know them well and got a good deal a it was a Demo Car ;)

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Is the deposit refundable? (Physical customer) Erm, whats the point in taking it then? :) 

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we will definitely  let you know

well you never buy the 1st  one you look  at do you

I am 99% sure we are having it

guys who let go of steering wheel on a test drive on an obviously cambered road, instantly deciding the chassis bent because its had an acceded........................ he got all of that in 5 seconds

people who dont turn up in PX even though both parties have talked endlessly about the PX

 

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Emails, text, phonecalls where they don't use my name or leave their name.... When they call from one number and say call back on another....

When they ring and say they're local and just want to "av a look".. erm no watch the fucking video and pay the deposit like veryone else.

I have watched your video, but I would never buy a car like that, when can I av a look.......

All my cars are BIN, yes I know but I just want to av a look..... 

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People who ask you to hold the car, but don't leave a deposit, despite you insisting on one!

99.9% of the time you never see or hear from them again.

The .1% that do, usually contact you after it's sold and are utterly gutted once they hear it's gone

 

Edited by Scooby who

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  • People who ask to see a car at a stupid time and even though they sound sincere, they then dont turn up.
  •  

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Hi Guys

With my absence from the trade in the past years, obviously nothing has changed all the same punter excuses etc, if I had a pound for every punter that said on the phone "we are leaving now" A I would be well off and B  I am still waiting for them to arrive.

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When the chocolate in your choc dips is too tough, and when you dip your stick in it break's off and then you have to use your fingers to fish it out again !! 

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WhatsApp. Particularly people who insist on using it when they have iPhones and know I do. 

Punters that don’t believe you when you say it didn’t come with a spare wheel. Think you’ve got it somewhere. 

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Not in order but

Hair Grips - find these bastards EVERYWHERE

High Pressure Fuel Pumps

Makeup ( all over steering wheels / door cards / interior mirrors )

Customer - Hi i'm calling about XXXX

Me - Yes, great news, its still available, lovely car,  I just finished the valet this morning myself, its cracking, great spec and probably the best colour combo, in fact its that nice i almost want it for myself.

Customer - Whats the best price.....

 

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On 06/01/2019 at 11:09 AM, Jack Regan said:

Joe Swash.

What is a Joe Swash?

Some sort of car cleaning product?

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"Whys it had so many owners?" 

Fucked if I know!

Had it three times now on a 2008 Mondeo over the weekend, it's had 5 owners, one every 2 years, think that's about normal for most folk?

 

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