Frank Cannon

Ohh Waxoyl, I'd forgotten about that, I used to do most of my old classics and then spend the next few days trying get it off my eyelashes and out of my hair.....then have to put up with the smell for a few weeks every time I went near the treated car, great stuff though.

I'd never get that past her indoors.....she still hasn't forgiven me the time she came home, to find a set of Trident headers being cured in her oven....another five minutes and I'd got away with that.

So the old war cry of "ban the civilians" didn't result in lower prices after all

Yup, spot on

I think the totally untrendy and, slightly agricultural Masters are the best of a bad bunch according to my garage. They look after a few fleets of totally hammered for a living vans.....Transits, Grafters, Sprinters and a few Masters....every time I go for a ticket they are hoofing new lumps in one of that first trio, or have wiring hanging out of them like Dr Who 60s Tardis. I drove a 16 plate Master with 200k up it before Christmas and it was good drive still, out of that into a 19 plate 'Tyranny' and Jesus H Christ it was soooooo slow with an interior that was disassembling itself as I drove along....the build was shocking. Had a nose around another even worse, where and by whom are these things built, Russian farm peasants. The Masters are eating rear door mechanisms, few injectors (what doesn't nowadays) the odd ignition switch but, I'd rather change those than a mill

Trade Vet will be blowing a head gasket now

That's not much of a recommendation Mark

I've a feeling that when/if/once this C19 is done and dusted, chasing VAT dodgers will be a savage sport and, probably sub'ed out from HMRC, to external bidders, on a fee per clawback principle...the sums would be worth it. With the crippling amount of debt being run up, to me it makes excellent business sense and, with every Tom, Dick, Ahmed and Domitri advertising on the Internet, can't be that hard to do, can it? I do a HPI check now and, I get information on recent sales listings. Perhaps even an idea there for a TV series, 'Sold a motor, pay ya VAT or, we'll take it away'....obviously the title needs a bit of fettling though

I too, usually say "I'm stocked up", more polite and ends the conversation there and then, you aren't going to reason with the lady.

my thought exactly I really can't work out how 'click and collect' is much different from turn up and buy....unless it's just the fact you can't try your new car 'on'...like Pri'mani.... I had to collect something bought from Argos, from my local Sainsburys and, I had to wait 15 minutes along with all the 'waiting to be offended, maskless, jogging bottom clad, egg stained, pasty faced and pastie eating fatties' breathing down my arse crack....don't often see a lean 'n mean healthy sort maskless or is that just me? I say that as a 24 carat bloater myself but, do have the manners to wear a mask, pointless or not....as a caveat I don't have egg stains down my front....I scrape them off before going out in public.

Also, this type of discussion really should be in the VIP area.

It's worth going thru the T&Cs of the bigger companies such Cinch etc as they have some very well written clauses. For example but not limited to: £500 retained until V5 sent back....many main agents do this and, interestingly, a Vauxhall dealer does a similar act for service history that has been declared for a px car but, not with the car on handover of said px. A set see 'if it fits' mileage is declared, Cinch are more generous than others at 250 miles, then a £1 per mile after that. Personally mine would be something like 80 miles and even that is being soft....that's ample to do a some lengthy trips of an hour or so. £500, which we will hold pending you returning the most recent V5C registration document to us in accordance with section 12.6. We need the V5C to be returned because the value of the Car will reduce without it; and You are entitled to use the Car to determine the nature, characteristics and functioning of the Car. We consider this use to be similar to a couple of test drives which you would receive if you were buying a Car from a dealer face to face. You must not use the Car after notifying us that you are cancelling the Agreement and you must keep the Car in good condition from the date of Delivery. We are entitled to charge you if the value of the Car has reduced as a result of excessive use by you or any damage you caused to the Car. We may charge you: 12.5.1 if the Car has been driven for more than 250 miles since Delivery, a fee equal to £1.00 for each mile driven in excess of 250 miles (Excess Mileage Payment); and/or 12.5.2 if the value of the Car has been reduced because it is not in the condition it was in at Delivery, our reasonable costs to repair the Car so that it is in the condition it was in at Delivery (Damage Payment). I have to say, I have never had an issue doing 'long distance' sales....but then again people were so much easier to deal with back pre C19 and, my prep/descriptions are solid and, ALWAYs undersell the car, I won't have it any other way. I know the return rate for Cazoo is substantial if, I can believe the delivery driver I spoke to before Crimble time but to be fair to him, some of the descriptions and prep' work I've seen, well you know. Family friend is a solicitor and, for a drink he drew up some teas and seas after I engaged a erm 'car dealers legal service' to do them and they made a complete dogs breakfast of the job, embarrassingly so, another story though. I've used these terms and just massaged them from time to time. .....ohh hang on there was one ohh, years ago when I was selling a lot of Jags, this was a late (then) Jaguar XJ that was bought for a 40th birthday present for a guys wife, who made Margo from the Good Life look happy....both GP's. Husband had bought an XJ6 Sport from me before and, the brief for her Jag was this, that and, the other but, HAD to be Sapphire Blue with Magnolia skin, no, nada, zero movement on that. A million photos taken, war and peace listing and a phone call walk around all OK'd, serviced and MOT'd ready to go and paid for up front as I had to store the car for a week. ...guy came up from the West Country (again) and, the wife took one look at the Jag and, I knew she wasn't happy as soon as she opened the door, tooth sucking, nose wrinkling 'n sniffing like I'd dropped one in the car earlier after, a heavy night on the Indian and, she shut the door a bit too smartly. long story short.....she genuinely thought Magnolia meant grey (that would be Windsor grey ma'm yes really, you'd think with a million houses in magnolia.....) they would of bought and walked but, I just KNEW the slightest excuse she would be rucking. So, I unwound the deal, kept a few quid for the hassle to which they didn't refuse so right move on my part I thought, she wanted out and, he wanted out to save him from hell of an unhappy Margo. ...sold the Blue and, very much Magnolia Jagwaaarrr three days later at a few 'undred quid more too, if I remember correctly. Here's the thing though, you can't do business at the moment without doing 'distance sales' so embrace it or go tits up.

Before an order is placed You must provide: your business name, contact details and address a description of your goods or services the price, including all taxes how a customer can pay delivery arrangements, costs and how long goods will take to arrive the minimum length of their contract and billing period conditions for ending contracts how they can cancel and when they lose the right to cancel if they will still need to pay reasonable costs for using a service after they cancel a standard cancellation form, if they can cancel conditions for money given as a deposit or financial guarantees what digital content does (for example, the language it’s in or how to update software) the cost of using phone lines or other communication to complete the contract where it will cost more than the basic rate This information must be easy to understand and on paper, in an email or another format the customer can save for future reference. Right to cancel There are different rules for downloads and streaming services. You must tell the customer they can cancel their order up to 14 days after their order is delivered. They don’t need to give a reason for cancelling. If you don’t tell the customer about their right to cancel, they can cancel at any time in the next 12 months. If you tell them about the right to cancel during these 12 months, they have 14 days to cancel from when you told them. After an order is placed You must: provide a copy of the contract on paper, by email or another format the customer can save for future reference provide the copy of the contract no later than when the goods are delivered deliver the goods within 30 days, unless you’ve agreed otherwise with the customer Reasonable costs for using a service.....if they are using the car.... 2013 wasn't it but, even the gov site refers to it as distance selling, clear as mud

Interesting. Back in the dim, distant old days a few headlight had replaceable glass lenses, I changed them on 90's C class for example......can't think of any today, that I deal with, having glass lenses as they are usually a plastic lens welded onto a plastic body.

People can still go to work, if they can't do thoer job from home etc, so from where I'm sitting has anything really changed bar not meeting anyone else from another house hold? F*cked if I know now, it's more confusing than a VAG buyer.

I would have thought that was a distance sale but, water under the bridge now.

How did they know?

happy Christmas guys and keep earning

Plus one, the ECOTY award is usually a kiss of death

Well, not quite, surely you are missing the whole point. .... there is the satisfaction and lovely warm comfortable feeling, that you are one of those 'hard working families'. Earning and thereby, giving to the huge pot, that is the countrys tax account, to help keep this country and, its people going and, progressing to an exciting, bright, vibrant new future. Hard working families, schools, hard working families, hospitals, hard working families etc. Disclaimer: The views expressed here are generic and may not concurr with the authors.

Just speak to your accountant, simples

I agree, once you can one to turn up they are usually OK. Had a Rusky try to short change me few weeks back, paid 3k in cash all in scores. "No need to be counting, money all here my friend, bank count money" "Well I better make sure you haven't given me too much then" ....counted it thrice and was 60 quid light each time, I knew it would be light, just by the looks going between him and his wife. When I pulled him up, he got quite shirty, pulling faces, waving arms and raising his voice, the usual piss and wind. Pregnant pause until his wife magically pulled the missing dosh from out of her coat pocket. All this crap soured the deal for me somewhat, up to that point he was a brusky rusky but, knew his cars.

I meant the cars weren't that bad, the Polish guys well, one was ok as they usually are and knew his cars ..... the second had to come back tail between his legs after I f*cked him off, for trying to crab the advisory notes from 4 years ago and thought I was selling a chameleon....didn't like the silver Sold and gone though, Spares Or Repair Lawgistics forms filled in, one trailered away the other sat for a few hours then disappeared after hours.

Trade sale You'd be surprised, just sold a Beetle as spares or repair and a leggy Espace before that via Scumtree, both to Polish guys....although they weren't that bad to be honest.