BHM

Don’t worry, if he’s anything like the emailers wanting valuations from me he’ll want retail for his ‘minter’ - usually no history, bald tyres, shagged brakes, 2 weeks MOT instead of the 10 months he claimed + an extra 40,000 miles.

+1. If you’ve got a tyre kicker and/or they then try to kick you in the nuts over money they’ll be PAYE.

Take the ‘1’ off the front of your price & you’ll be nearer the mark. Tbh it’s barely worth a wank, as if the 3 doors aren’t bad enough it’s also a plonker. I had the dubious pleasure of owning almost the same car (3dr, red 1.3 SR, mint condition) but NOT on the register & it had FSH. I couldn’t raffle it then after six months a trader took a shine to it. I see he still has it 3 months later........

Very true. Tbh my attitude is if the greedy public wish to get involved let them - they’ll get a free education in economics.

It would of sucked the oil wells dry doing 700K in one of those

I think your correct. Unless it’s something they can plug in & convince themselves it’s a £30 bodge repair. If there’s a code or two to be read on the shit £25 code reader I have in my drawer then the ‘Spares Or Repair Brigade’ struggle with the concept of spending £150 in parts & a mornings graft - basically it’s beyond their mental grasp. There’s a reason why many people are skint. It’s because they are lazy & greedy.

Too true!!! Get the fuckers told!

....and despite NOT opening on a Sunday I switched on my phone, a local man immediately phoned, promised to be 10 minutes & not mess me about. In fact it took him 12 minutes to get here but he stuck to the other part of his statement. I’ll be a Sunday convert shortly I’ve got about 4 or 5 long-termers but if I’m honest I look at 3 of them & think ‘Why on earth did I buy that?’. In my case it was greed (cheapish) & stupidity overcoming common sense & experience.

Years ago I’d of said you might nab one or two but tbh I find nowadays it makes little difference cos if they don’t get bids the auctioneers bounce bids off the walls. They might as well replace auctioneers with machines nowadays. I don’t know with your type of stock but with mine I can hardly find any cars I really want anyway. Finding suitable stock seems desperate at the moment, or the stock offered is in desperate condition

Cheeky sod ...and funny how some cars attract no one. I have a selection

I was complaining a few days ago that it’s been dead but I’ve sold/taken deposits on 5. I suspect just a temporary flurry before I’m back to my usual couple a week. Very few other calls though so it still ‘feels’ quiet. As is the norm, the newer stock has sold but the last of my DA cast offs have been sat months without a sniff & still are. I’ll be having a fire sale shortly just to move some of the shit.

They’ve had sales on bank holidays as long as I’ve been in this game.

That’s called “The Mrs”. So so true. My last two XC90s (£5500 & 5750) the buyers did not give a toss, both deals done in about 15 minutes. It’s worth mentioning that they had usual Volvo side bolster material splitting - I pointed it out to the buyers this weekend & they looked at me as though I was from outer space for even mentioning it. Now imagine the response of the typical BMW/VAG man! What would follow would be a pitiful display of greed, whinging & nonsensical comments brought on by their expectations of perfection.

Straight talk & mechanical preparation - it’s easier doing the job right in the first place. They ALL get used for a few miles (usually at least 50), I correct anything mechanically deficient (or sell those beyond hope clearly as such), reMOT about 90%, fuck off what I consider to be arseholes over the phone, I do not respond to texts, only sell to people who I consider acceptable customers, talk straight & deal straight. The fact I only shift about 100 per year obviously helps. In the last 2.5 years I’ve put my hand in my pocket once (£50 & told the man to go to Trading Standards if he wasn’t happy - an old p/x Astra that he wanted new alternator money for but as I pointed out old cars have old parts). In that time I’ve probably had 2 or 3 other phone calls from chancers trying it on (usually on my bottom end stock) “cos my mechanic says xxxxxx” - a few questions soon catches out this scum at which point I tell them to jog on. However in that time I’ve lost count of the number of NEW clutches, tyres, calipers, batteries, wheel bearings, disc & pads I’ve renewed prior to sale so I guess my ALMOST hassle-free business model has its price. I’ve cursed myself now, there’ll be a flood of whingers on Tuesday

Honestly Dave, you have to ask yourself are these numbskulls for real?

Dear me! I hope you’re a big pitch cos as a one man band I’ve not had 2 returns in 2 years.

The trouble is greedy messers are greedy messers, it’s in their genes. They say they’ve missed out on other cars yet fuck about & miss out again.

Hahaha, FFS!!!!

That reminds me, I must make an appointment at the dentist.

They are until you take one of their vendors to court

Yep, I’ve sacked off a couple of arseholes over the phone. Mind you today I’ve done two, a (proper) friend has just texted to say he wants one of my cars and I’ve a serious viewing tomorrow. Bank holidays to me means to be extra cautious who to let visit because there’ll be thousands of middle aged men with time to kill wanting to look at cars.

Tbh I’ve had a few & if it’s written clearly in the advert it’s not been a bar to a sale - mind you, it’s always been on cheap shit where the price is all that matters.

I’ve been with them for over a decade. They don’t have any recovery vehicles, they’re just a call centre who farm out the work to local recovery companies. As such the local recoverers do not give a toss cos they just want paying. The only proviso is I know Auto Aid check the MID to check the car is insured before allocating it to a job so put your cars on your MID. I’m sure if you ask “Do you cover trade?” the answer will be no so don’t bother asking. I’ve used them 4 or 5 times & can’t speak highly enough of the service they offer.

“None of your business but I don’t discount anyway”. This is usually met with huffing & puffing as I put the phone down. The email enquiries are ignored.

Yep, + wanting free assistance using the goodwill of complete strangers.