David Horgan 564 Posted January 7, 2019 2 hours ago, Mat C said: Not in order but Hair Grips - find these bastards EVERYWHERE High Pressure Fuel Pumps Makeup ( all over steering wheels / door cards / interior mirrors ) Customer - Hi i'm calling about XXXX Me - Yes, great news, its still available, lovely car, I just finished the valet this morning myself, its cracking, great spec and probably the best colour combo, in fact its that nice i almost want it for myself. Customer - Whats the best price..... I always add £500 and tell em that's a much better price 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Stalker 180 Posted January 7, 2019 Non exhaustive list:- People ringing up on behalf of somebody else in the room... and relaying the messages! (The funniest one i ever heard was a wife saying "Here you fat bastard.... you f@*king questions!" and handing the phone over! ) EGR Valves Chucky Duffers Impatient Customers (especially the ones that barge in when your dealing with somebody and think its ok to talk over the top of you) Cars that break for no obvious reason and the worst times.... 4pm on a Saturday etc.... Liars Salesmen leaving their trademark in the toilet Staff that ask millions of questions without thinking for themselves 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dan W 57 Posted January 7, 2019 People turning up 5 mins before you close wanting to test drive a ' couple of cars ' Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NOACROSS 414 Posted January 7, 2019 <<<<Impatient Customers (especially the ones that barge in when your dealing with somebody and think its ok to talk over the top of you)>>> Good one. I so hate this! What makes them think they’re more important. Worst is when they then go and sit or hang behind the customers you’re dealing with and get offended when you ask them to wait outside or elsewhere in the place for ten minutes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
David Horgan 564 Posted January 7, 2019 Just had one ask me , How many owners ? Two Keys ? Service history , Will it be serviced before leaving , Does it have a new MOT , Any wear on the leather , Has it got Mats ?. Is the tyre tread above 5mm all round ? , Whats your warranty involve ? Any dents 2 owners , two keys and YES to the questions , No to dents and leather wear He goes oh that's perfect £8,795 screen Well on that basis I'm prepared to travel the 200 miles and I can offer £7,500 . Told him to save up £1,295 and pop down to see us . If you cant quite get to the price we offer finance , Maybe £1,295 deposit and rest over 48 months would suit you better . Told me he will call at end of Jan when I will have to take £7k HAHA . Cant wait for the call Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
david gott 58 Posted January 7, 2019 Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NOACROSS 414 Posted January 7, 2019 1 minute ago, david gott said: Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! I just say that it’s our specialty (finding very low mileage cars). They are out there if you know where to look but it takes loads of effort and experience. That and it was /was probably an older couple that had two cars and really just needed their bus pass. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dave2302 387 Posted January 7, 2019 "Let me get my Crystal Ball Sir" Fuckin muppets most of 'em 20 minutes ago, david gott said: Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? 1 hour ago, David Horgan said: Just had one ask me , How many owners ? Two Keys ? Service history , Will it be serviced before leaving , Does it have a new MOT , Any wear on the leather , Has it got Mats ?. Is the tyre tread above 5mm all round ? , Whats your warranty involve ? Any dents 2 owners , two keys and YES to the questions , No to dents and leather wear He goes oh that's perfect £8,795 screen Well on that basis I'm prepared to travel the 200 miles and I can offer £7,500 . Told him to save up £1,295 and pop down to see us . If you cant quite get to the price we offer finance , Maybe £1,295 deposit and rest over 48 months would suit you better . Told me he will call at end of Jan when I will have to take £7k HAHA . Cant wait for the call Where the fuck do you guys find these retards Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Arfur Dealy 823 Posted January 7, 2019 44 minutes ago, david gott said: Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! Erm, because its not been driven...... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
It's me 615 Posted January 7, 2019 27 minutes ago, Dave2302 said: "Let me get my Crystal Ball Sir" Fuckin muppets most of 'em Where the fuck do you guys find these retards well to be fair seeing as he was travelling 200 miles he might be your neighbour Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Autolink100 34 Posted January 7, 2019 On 06/01/2019 at 4:58 PM, Arfur Dealy said: like like like People who respond to a post by just putting "Like" 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Arfur Dealy 823 Posted January 7, 2019 Just now, Autolink100 said: People who respond to a post by just putting "Like" If only I had a like button......... 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NOACROSS 414 Posted January 7, 2019 Ha. Can I vote for ‘people who have a like and edit button’? 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
EPV 631 Posted January 7, 2019 1 hour ago, david gott said: Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! I tell them that the reason it’s so low mileage is the previous owners didn’t drive it very far. Its facetious, bordering on being rude and people either get funny with you or they see the joke and relax a little. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
have a word with the wife 299 Posted January 7, 2019 2 hours ago, david gott said: Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! it was owned by a elderly person, when they went to the shop, they came back in reverse Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dealer 54 Posted January 7, 2019 Cargurus email leads where it says "i am interested in your lada Riva estate, you can reach me by email on blahblahblah@gmail.com" You then respond giving your email address, telephone number etc only to never get a reply (we are not on the free service either). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
have a word with the wife 299 Posted January 7, 2019 "glitter" its the new "dog hair" but harder to shift Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tradegirl 112 Posted January 7, 2019 "Best price for cash" "It's too expensive for (insert model)" (Why are you calling me then?" "Found another one for £X" (Go buy that one then) "If it's still available then I'll have it for £X" (Fuck off) Idiots who think they know about cars, who over rev and pull on the doors, and those who release the steering wheel on the best drive and comment on a slight lean to the left or right" "Not sure what car we want yet/the colour/etc" "Where did you get it from?" (that almost guarantees me telling them it's a part ex) Hagglers who roll up only to make out the car's a pile of crap to knock down the price. Cars that you can't put right no matter how much money you throw at them. No shows. God, the list goes on. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SC Derby 259 Posted January 7, 2019 We had one customer ask if the fact it had an air freshener hanging in the shape of a C meant it was a CAT C No the last owner was called Chantal hahahaha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
It's me 615 Posted January 7, 2019 people who dont read adverts i once put 5 words in an advert and got lots of interest but never sold it i also once put blah blah blah in the advert and didnt sell that either (a hilman avenger) doing this job you just need to chill or its a heart attack seen lots of guys die young because of the stress when i used to go to the auctions you would notice someone missing,they were dead or had had a stroke Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
David Horgan 564 Posted January 8, 2019 14 hours ago, Dave2302 said: "Let me get my Crystal Ball Sir" Fuckin muppets most of 'em Where the fuck do you guys find these retards I could write a book Dave 9 hours ago, boring dave said: people who dont read adverts i once put 5 words in an advert and got lots of interest but never sold it i also once put blah blah blah in the advert and didnt sell that either (a hilman avenger) doing this job you just need to chill or its a heart attack seen lots of guys die young because of the stress when i used to go to the auctions you would notice someone missing,they were dead or had had a stroke Your right there have to see the funny side when you get a complete fool in , I have fun with the idiots i must admit , not worth getting stressed over 14 hours ago, david gott said: Whys it such low mileage is my absolute most hated question Has anybody got any good comebacks for this??? The only one that ever pops into my head is "Its been clocked" and the customer never gets it, they just look at me as if thats just what they expect a car dealer to do! It obviously hasn't been driven very far has it , is my reply Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dave2302 387 Posted January 8, 2019 13 hours ago, boring dave said: well to be fair seeing as he was travelling 200 miles he might be your neighbour If he is near me he's obviously one of the very few who I've had to educate to stay the fuck outta my place, cos I don't do twats !! But if he travelled 200 miles to get to you then he won't be in the Highlands, I am ~ 300 miles from the border 13 hours ago, Arfur Dealy said: If only I had a like button......... Me too /\ /\ /\ like 8 minutes ago, David Horgan said: I could write a book Dave LOL, I'm sure we all could, that's why I'm up here, much less of it, and much less traffic .................. Oh there's another for the list .................. Tourists in Camper Vans / towing Caravans / loaded up MPV's / Estate Cars etc with the bicycles on the roof rack or overhanging the back end, driving at 25 mph on a 60 mph A road and then slowing even further for every bend !! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blenheim Car Sales 111 Posted January 8, 2019 people who drive 40mph in a national speed limit road and then when its a 30mph built up area carry on at 40 mph Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dan W 57 Posted January 8, 2019 53 minutes ago, David Horgan said: I could write a book Dave Your right there have to see the funny side when you get a complete fool in , I have fun with the idiots i must admit , not worth getting stressed over It obviously hasn't been driven very far has it , is my reply Exactly the same response I give when people ask why hasn't it sold yet... because no one has bought it lol Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
