BHM

On a serious note, although currently I’m getting a few arseholes everyday asking puerile questions, it won’t be long before some of the general public will be GENUINELY looking for cars. At the moment I’m closed but what ‘policies’ will others be implementing to limit contact for the foreseeable future? Unfortunately I can’t see Argoses new pay online & in advance working on secondhand cars (and neither do I blame the punters for this).

I’ve just received this email via eBay; hi can l look cars A serious buyer, obviously concerned about minimising infection, shall I let this punter around?

This seems beyond the minds of punters desperate to palm off their knackered p/xs. Funnily enough these same punters always have moonshot valuations too. I’ll tell you what, unless these punters manage to stick their shit p/xs into traders who are desperate to put dinner on the table there are going to be some properly fucked trade-ins when we get back to normal.

Haha, the ‘couple of cars on the driveway’ boys don’t appear to give a fuck about non essential activity. Funnily enough neither do a few dickheads (they sound older folk but I could be mistaken) wanting cars taking to them for a look. Obviously non essential travel doesn’t apply when it’s the car going to them rather than them going to the car? FFS. Mind you, I could do a roaring trade if I was prepared to bend over, part my buttocks to expose my sphincter & discount by four figure sums for the Virus Brigade, funnily enough not a single one of them has followed up their not-so-generous email offers with a phone call.

Christ, even a pandemic doesn’t stop these fuckwits.

Anyone who’s saying they can’t pay this month’s rent is either a piss taker or their business was already knackered anyway.

and only this afternoon you asked for a phone number to FaceTime another member of this forum. Filthy pervert!

The govt seem as keen as pushing this almost as hard as social distancing. It’s no wonder so many young adults nowadays haven’t got a clue about using money and/or abusing debt. Cash is king. Always has been, always will be and no amount of govt propaganda or bullshit from people (usually themselves swimming in debt) will convince me differently.

I’m sure it’ll get plenty of signatures but as with most things on the internet it should be taken with a pinch of salt. 10 minutes ago the signatures increased before my very eyes from 6995 to 7005. Totally plausible except the exact same thing also happened about 2 minutes ago .

Food for thought: The IMDA sought help on this forum to top up bonuses merely hours after the govt announced there had been 260 deaths in the preceding 24 hours. I wonder what drum they’ll be banging tonight after the latest death toll is announced. I AM ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED.

On reflection I must confess, my reading of the current situation is that car retailing is closed.

How right you are! Seriously? Poor salespeople struggling by on £12K before commission. How much sympathy do you honestly think you’re going to get from millions of shop workers and zero hour contracted staff? Bearing in mind the pandemic that’s sweeping the world, are you seriously suggesting the star seller at a Land Rover dealership, who’s taken home an £80K user for the next few weeks, is topped up to their usual level? If so I’ll put this in easy to understand terms; You are an idiot. I think you’ve seriously misjudged the mood of the nation and the seriousness of current world events. If some have to struggle by on £800pm HARD LUCK - there are people dying. You need to give your head a shake.

Are you for fucking real?

Trading Standards employee or just the usual self appointed do-gooder with too much time on your hands?

Sounds good but just a query. Why are you withholding their £100? Is it an appointment fee as opposed to a deposit?

Speak to the prospective customer, tell her you’ll be practicing social distancing, when she arrives chuck the keys at her & tell her to go & look at it. Then it’s a case of yes or no, once the money’s through let her go (or come back to collect on another day after you’ve received payment). All I’m getting is one or two stupid bored cnuts everyday emailing shit offers. Tbh it’d be nice to book a fortnight away but where can we go?

Do both of you think it was the alleged power of Facebook shaming them? I could be wrong as usual but I suspect it more likely the total lack of sales at the moment twisted their arm. Similar, but different. What are your views on a DA vendor openly advertising they’ll come in to make a trade sale because their workshop is open?

Apart from large main dealer sites the only units/pitches around here with the same tenants I can count on the fingers of one hand, and two of them are owner operators. That says it all to me about this industry - almost EVERY pitch I’m aware of for miles has involved either numerous tenants and/or changes of trading name.

I remember going to one of their early auctions years ago - I think it was only their second or third but don’t quote me - and even then punters were fighting for everything. Quite by chance I subsequently sold a car to one of the sons, the blonde one Paul, a few couple of months after I’d attended & he said they’d been pleasantly surprised by the response & the family were optimistic for the future. One thing’s for sure, they’ll be doing a whole lot more business than when they were just selling a few from the garage. Good luck to them, nice straightforward people from my limited contact with them.

Daksh Gupta’s comment about one year’s profit being one month’s operating costs rams home how bad this will hit the big boys. How refreshing to hear a major player taking in such forthright & straightforward manner. Can you imagine such an interview with a couple of the auction houses finest & a city analyst? I obviously don’t need to point this out to you but if I had a unit to let I’d have absolutely f.a. to do with letting it to this trade. I bought my current house about 4 years ago so I can accurately note the machinations of the local traders over 4 years. If I either pointed to any number of particular pitch locations OR a number of particular people I can honestly say MANY pitches have had 2 or 3 changes of business tenant AND many of the people in this trade have had 2 or 3 different locations and/or different trading names. Quite frankly this industry attracts some of the biggest fly by night bullshitters going.

They’re hardly the first Billy Bullshitter in this game.

Without the vermin who would we sell cars too?

No need TV, these twats NEVER deal. Anyway I believe the contract of sale isn’t concluded until the customer has seen the merchandise. I remember the man I once let get on the train & phoned him to cancel halfway through his 5 hour journey - he learnt a valuable lesson on being a greedy twat. I had a couple of these twats at the beginning of the week. After they’d inevitably withdrew their original offer (they always do OR just disappear) I then emailed telling them not to embarrass themselves in future. Both of these specimens email every day, one has decreased his offer & the other, realising he’s not getting a response, has now emailed for a viewing

No thank you. The last time I tried that stuff I was playing Johnny Big Balls, ordered the superskunk & had 4 or 5 puffs of it. The result was I couldn’t speak, started hallucinating & couldn’t move from the stool for about half an hour! I had been in Amsterdam for less than 90 minutes & two fellow gentlemen of the motor trade had to assist me back to my hotel room! What a state to find oneself in F*** that stuff, I’ll stick to drink, thank you very much.

Today is your lucky day my friend! I’ve always admired 15yr old CRVs, 10yr old Galaxies & battered Corsa p/xs. As luck might have it I have an example of each in stock ready for your purchase.