David Horgan

Send them back to CAP & Glasses , tell them they were nearer at valuing cars years ago far more accurate than they are now

Hi Tom Well done for starting up to begin with . Pics of your cars , need a new camera to start with , stand further back and zoom in , , Simple camera like a DSR type has Zoom for framing and Macro for close up inside . They have better lens too so the interior shots look real , The Merc seats look small and laid back on yours , that's the lens in whatever your using . Remember to frame the car edge to edge as well , your selling metal not trees bushes and surrounding cars , oh keep your jeans shoes and face out of the pics too, they are looking for cars not clothes . The rest is down to you really , stock , prices , and everything else is personal to you . Good start though , Some nice stock too . Well done so far Sorry if i come over direct , its how i am , not changing now mmmm that's me being direct again isn't , oh well now you know what i am .

He has a production line though , sells 3 a day 6 days a week , his thing is he will buy anything , any condition , any mileage. has a good gaff going at present , new wheels , wrapped , lowered , out of the place with a turn round of three days , off to a fine art . vans are bloody mad price at present though aren't they ,

Caddys are the latest street cred thing to have though , so that doesn't help them , Know a guy who will pay eye shattering money for any caddy going , Then pays £1,000 to have it wrapped in violent colours , lowering kit on to slam it to the ground and adds 2k on top , takes him less than two days to sell them , 80/90/120 k motors he cant buy em fast enough .

Not Car related but still makes me laugh even now A good few years ago I ran a Mushroom farm , Now mushrooms farms are just about the cleanest places ever , ANY dirt about and they die , or don't grow , so the insensitive is to keep it all very very clean , Foot baths , clean clothes , hand washing , different staff for different areas , its has to be run very clinical if you want it to work . So i came out of a spawn running house , to find this twat coming out of whats called a Casing house a very highly sensitive time of the crop , so i go who the bloody hell are you then This pompous twat says I'm from the council health and hygiene dept , Stood there covered in a dirty white coat . I said can you read , Yes he goes why , You have passed two barriers , four no entry signs stepped over a red Chain and entered a door that says DO NOT ENTER . He told me rules didn't apply and he can go where he likes HAHA He left the area horizontal , dropping papers , pens and one shoe . I had the back of his belt on his trousers and his hair , Ran him out and he entered his car a red Rover 214 haha through the passenger window , to claps from 30 of the pickers that were on tea break . One said how did you know the window was open Boss , I didn't Just reminded me when i read that bit on the rough guy who never had a visit . We never had a visit after either . Saw him in Newark town centre a few months after , he crossed the road and kept his down , Sometimes it just works

Wrong Still get Covid even after you had the jab ,Its just not as bad for YOU , if your lucky as its only 50 % effect really . Still pass it on though as a carrier

Ok this lady rings me up . Hello i like the white i 10 auto you have for sale yes nice car that one Do you deliver cars , Were do you live , Portsmouth , OK to far for us 300 miles away sorry as we cant get back very easy , Now the stupid bit . THATS OK She says i can take you back , " WHAT " , Now i couldn't make her see sense in the fact she was effectively fetching it if I agreed to that , but its not social distance rules I said , we left it as shes going to call a relative in Nottingham . see if he/she will collect it and shes going to fetch it from their place Nottingham is 14 miles from us

Me too Don't know who agreed to it in the first place on second hand goods , Oh we cant add vat to used goods so lets just take it on the traders profits instead , Yea great idea , Like to meet the fool who agreed that deal for the industry

To old , not registered for VAT and not selling , mmmm bit rude I'd say . Didn't know that was compulsory really . Wouldn't let them get to you mate if I was you . Pleased your ok though in these weird times

I was thinking that yesterday . Hope you guys are ok .

We had a good customer who buys cars from us , 3 last year and previous years too , We always service his cars too if he manages to keep one long enough . hes in yesterday having his S3 serviced , looks at a VRS we have and says that's nice , So we and him can be on site to service his car , perfectly legal . He then cant be even on the same site to look at a car 4 ft away from himself , He was leaning on it when he was a service customer , Ran like the wind when he wanted to buy it ' Mad world We had a cuppa and had a proper laugh at the world going nuts , Anyway he bought it

Had a call yesterday , golf Q ; has it had a cam belt and water pump , Has it got two keys , Does sat Nav work , Whats the make of the tyres . When was last service done . A : All the info is on the web site , take a look but don't mess about as its very popular 2nd Q list , Is there any rust has it got leather seats , Are they heated , whens MOT due and will it have a new one . TODAY ;; A; Told you not to mess its SOLD . THEN Q ; 3rd list , If all those questions can be answered correctly and by close of business i can offer you £18,000 and take it away . Answer , ; Listen my friend The car has a CHAIN not a BELT , Its advertised with TWO KEYS , SAT NAV works and its on the PICTURES i told you to look at , Advert says its NEW PIRELLIS all round , Advert says JUST SERVICED NOW , Pictures show its NOT LEATHER but cloth and Suede and yes its HEATED because it says so and PICTURED , New MOT Stated on Advert , There is no RUST as its only just 3 Years old , BUT ITS NOW SOLD and NO i wouldn't have took your £18,000 as its advertised for £21,000 BUT ITS SOLD you missed it . Response from him I Can offer £19,000 then I didn't answer so the prat sent a Row of ??????????? Thick stupid idiot , Good job he didn't buy it as its 300 bhp and his brain cant work that fast .

Haha , kiss goodbye to £995 the easy way , tell him you would sooner post £995 down a drain . Cheeky pillock he is

Bet they will wish they'd bought now as when the lockdown ends all these happy go lucky cash offering loons will get left behind as prices rise to meet short supply and high demand . see it coming cant you , nothing moving into auction , no main dealer PX moving , No private sellers with anything bar junk ,and yet we have these fools are offering us 30% off bids . for well prepped fully serviced cars

£2 a month David = 1.75 litres of petrol , 6 eggs , 3 mars bars , loaf of bread " unless its Asda then 9 Loaves " Means the kids don't starve Complete bloody idiots at this moment in time

They never buy anyway when the first line whats the best price . So i have a laugh with them Others are ; Whats so offensive with the price then ? For customers shopping above their budget we offer Finance . I can get that car to £212 a month but do call me for a quote to match your budget Its Sold Got two offers on the car , both ABOVE screen . Go on then Make my day , Tell me what you can afford mmmmmm ok I've decided the question is rude If your serious make an offer , if you dont hear back its because i'm rolling about laughing .

I always answer whats yer best price with and increase . £8995 on screen , Then this follows ; Well my best price is £9,295 thank you ,

very very true . Bloody hell . love to have took the tyres off and presented her the car on the rims Dec 19 with 30 k and its your fault somehow , Total idiots they are , Finance wont wear that pal don't worry

I tried that one , she was having none of it . just had another lady on now . Do you buy cars , Yes we do if you have what we sell 14 Kia Ceed 90 k on clock , only we buy any car are shut and i want to sell it . Anyway she starts rambling about how cars are hard to buy for us so she is in the trade and knows it books at £3,600 apparently , due to that problem we have she wants no less than £4,000 , Its a petrol Ceed in red , two weeks MOT and it was serviced when she bought it I said have you seen that Dragons Den Show ? Yes she said . " Well I'm OUT " was my reply

OK its close to the cars devils in the detail on grammar I see , I promise to concentrate better in future

just had a chat with one lady who asked for " whats your best price via email " I rang her and she was adamant that we should be discounting cars because of covid 19 . When I asked why she went rambling on about keeping people moving was our duty as we had the cars , we wasn't selling many due to lock down , we were probably getting grants , staff on furlough anyway so we should sell cars for less money and stop being greedy . I asked what the best price should be then on the £12,995 car she desired her answer was whatever the customer could afford to pay you for it , So I pushed again , Give me a price YOU can afford then on that basis , £8,000 she said , I asked her why she didn't look for an £8,000 car if that's the case . She called me a money grabbing horrible man and clicked off . Stupid Cow

If work cannot be done from home then yes you can go to work , Road testing cars is permissible under the its being road tested for safety , picking up parts is part of the servicing of cars which is permissible , Sending a V62 off will be dealt with so that's ok . We run car sales which is shut obviously , but our workshop is still open , we are on site due to that being open , just a closed sign on the showrooms door and a chain across the cars that are outside .

That's been said before I don't tolerate fools easy

My daughter got pulled before Christmas , Twat copper was about 18 and pulled her for no insurance , Trade car it was . Took her calling the station to get through his thick head that plates are on the insurance MID , he was arguing they only cover TAX took his boss to put him right . Prat . She took his head off afterwards in the petrol station forecourt with an audience , bet his ears are stilling remembering that LOL not one to be messed with is my daughter , ex prison officer she can make grown men bleed from their eyes sockets . Only 8 stone 5 and 5' 4" but strewth

Tax online as normal using same V5C2 , dead easy