GreenGiant

Dear Auto Trader Group. Or PLC. Or whatever you are this month. Congratulations. In the words of Young Mr Grace, you’ve all done very well. For yourselves. Since my last attempt to get you to own up to your mistakes, awful decisions and unjustified money-grabbing, a lot has happened hasn’t it? It seems my little outburst was perfectly timed. But not from your perspective. You didn’t need a buzzy little mosquito around you while you were all trying to stuff your faces into the trough. It must have irritated like hell when you were trying to show the City how your market dominance was generating huge profits to justify a (ludicrous) valuation, to have somebody pointing out how stupid and arrogant you were. I know it irritated because a couple of days after I wrote it one of your Directors tried to contact me for a private discussion. I declined. I believe you wanted to have the same discussion that you had already had with the large dealer groups a few days earlier. You know, the one where you admitted there had been a slight hiccup in your Data Provision (aka almighty cock-up), but you were on top of it and all would be well in due course. Trouble is, you weren’t big enough to admit it publicly. CAP have been laughing their tits off at both you and Glass, haven’t they? Justifiably, in my view. Although they’re out of pocket, they have more than made up for it in kudos and column inches. Have you seen the article they’ve been promoting? That’s you they are mocking for believing the nonsense that Glass told you. All in all, it’s a little bit awkward isn’t it? CAP contacted me too, wanting me to contribute to a press release and a podcast about the whole debacle so they could really rub Glass’ (and your) nose in it. I declined that too. Earlier this week, you got one of your poor overworked employees to PM me, inviting me to your HQ to “show me some of the things that you are doingâ€. I have no clue why you thought I would give a tuppenny toss about your wondrous plans for the future – you can’t get things right in the present. Again, I declined. I think I ended my reply along the lines of: “I'm sick of your Company and its cynical attitude. They pretend to care, but they don't really - it's all about the money. You'll see.†Meantime, you’ve been strutting around feeling very proud of yourselves. Also justifiably. Mainly because you have now managed to raise the not inconsiderable sum of £2.35Billion. Two thousand, three hundred and fifty million pounds. No wonder you couldn’t be arsed to answer a couple of salient points raised by a customer. Because I was right: It IS all about the money. You lucky, lucky, greedy, greedy boys

Yesterday morning, I was all ready with a high blood-pressure rant that I was going to share with all you good people today. I had it prepared, spleen beautifully vented, grammar and spelling checked and all ready to upload. Then I saw a number. And everything changed. What number? A very big number. 2.35 Billion, to be precise. This, apparently, is the Market Value of the all-conquering, uncaring, money-grabbing behemoth that is Auto Trader Group. OMG. Has the world (or more specifically, the City) gone stark raving mental? £2.35 a share? I wouldn’t give you £2.35 for the whole shebang. It’s incredible. They have no tangible product, little or no assets and an ever-dwindling customer base. Admittedly, a 57% profit margin looks good on paper (whilst we’re scratching around for 2 or 3%...), but that is all that it is – on paper. So, 6 weeks on from my original diatribe, my rant this week has now become:

I spent a bit of time this week compiling a list of potential subjects for a rant. At my time of life I find I'm easily grumped and there is a few fairly safe targets: Lane discipline Petrol v Diesel conundrum Semi-Auto/Tiptronic/EGS/Easytronic/Dualogic gearboxes. And associated clutch wear. And Dual Mass Flywheels. And EGR valves. GAP insurance Paint Protection products BCA Auto Trader (may have already covered that one...) However. It seems I have a Special Guest Ranter this week. Without invitation admittedly, but it is an open forum, so I'm OK with it. Welcome, Ling. I refuse to be drawn into commenting. Especially in relation to the last sentence. But I think I may be developing a bit of a crush...

This week, I thought I’d refrain from frothing over things that go on in the outside world and pick on a scab that the Motor Trade is seemingly happy to display to the outside world. There has been a steady increase in this pernicious blight over the last few years. A practice that has spread from Finance Houses to auction companies, Car Supermarkets, big groups, little groups… in fact, anyone that has no shame and thinks they can get away with it. In fact, it has become just another method by which Average Joe is having his pocket picked by the greedy, greedy boys. I’m talking about Admin Fees. One of those Ryanair-like phenomena whereby you tell your customers how much the thing is they want to buy, then charge more for it right at the end of the process. Because you can. It’s a rip-off. I know it, you know it and, more importantly, your one-time-only customers know it. You see it as an essential revenue stream. They see it as a con. You think the customers agree that the compulsory ‘fee’ you charge to cover the cost of raising an invoice should be massively disproportionate and shouldn’t be included within the up-front selling price along with all your other overheads. They don’t – they see it as a con. You feel justified as it appears to show transparency in how there are no ‘hidden’ charges. They know there are no hidden charges anyway and see it as a con. You think that, as you itemise it separately on the invoice, you can then advertise your cars at a slightly lower 'price' than the honest (old-school, maybe. But definitely honest.) Dealer up the road and attract more enquiries. Everyone else sees it as a con. (And how that affects the data that certain online portals calculate their ‘valuations’ is a whole different ball of wax.) Anyway, I hope it’s only a matter of time before Trading Standards sniffs around and they never find the stench of Corporate Greed pleasant. Meantime, your one-time-only customers are becoming my Customers for Life. So Cheers for that, but why do you have to be so *%&?ing greedy?!

It has come to my attention (especially after reading back some of my postings) that a lot of things conspire to push me ever nearer to the edge of sanity. Therefore, I feel that a more controlled, but regular, outburst of vitriol and venom would be more beneficial to me mentally and physically. After all, a popped aneurism isn't a good look and doesn't usually end well... Thus Ranty Friday is introduced. With acknowledgements and respect to a friend who blogs for a living and who's idea I have, without shame, nicked. The concept is for me to vent a bit of spleen on a motoring-related topic that has, quite frankly, got on my tits that week, but one that I also need to get over. First topic? This will surprise one or two, but it isn't Auto Trader. I think I have realised that you can't fix stupidity. Thankfully, stupidity tends to fix itself in the end. No, I've got the hump with 'Special' Drivers. There is a section of motorway near me that is undergoing massive change to become a 'smart' motorway (no idea what that is - probably don't care anyway). Whilst this huge civil engineering project is underway, there is a fixed 50mph limit for many, many miles. This week. I was on the aforementioned and set the cruise control at exactly 50mph, sat in the left hand lane and made dull but steady progress. I was the slowest vehicle on the road. Everyone else had no problem thundering past me at a variety of speeds. So, a question goes to all those drivers: What is it that you have said or done that makes you so 'special' that the rules don't apply to you? There are speed cameras throughout the route and so, I hope, you will all be getting an appropriate bill through the post and all you really achieved was a bit of temporary glory and an opportunity to get to the next queue a few seconds early. So why can't you just stick at 50 and we can all get where we're going together? You'll save a bit of fuel too.

And that, my friends, pretty much explains everything. Cut the costs every which way you can, increase revenue (and, therefore, bottom line), ignore complaints by fobbing the customers off, bullsh*t the potential buyers by pretending everything's fabulous and get it sold, take the money and run. Champagne anyone?

There's probably a great deal of merit in the analysis that you suggest, Philip, but, to be honest mate, my working day consists of: Check emails take & make phone calls Buy cars Expose cars to danger of sale (ie prep 'em & advertise 'em) sell cars go home drink beer & watch football rinse & repeat I'm not sure there's enough hours in the day that can be spared for non-productive number crunching, however beneficial it may appear. I just get a feel for what works and what doesn't. Not very scientific, but the bills get paid.

..."If you do have any specific vehicles whereby the vehicle data is incorrect, please let me know and we will look into this for you. " *sigh* I believe that the number of different make/model/derivatives currently being 'valued' by Glass is well in excess of 52,000. That's Fifty-two THOUSAND. Plus different colours, trims and options on all of them. It would be easier to tell them which few they've got right! I apologise for banging on about this, but this company made over £100million profit out of us in 2013. And probably a shed load more last year. Their product sucks, as does their customer service. And still they pretend to have all the answers and talk down to us. Tbh, i don't think A/T have any idea how big this cock-up is. If they do, why aren't those in charge saying something? Or are they just looking after the big boys and to hell with the rest of us?

Anything to do with them now being owned by AutoTrader and chucked in as part of a 'package' (ie charged for, but the cost hidden) to everyone, irrespective?

I'm biting my tongue for now. Except to say thank you to 'Bethany' (if that is your name) for the response. Shame it doesn't answer any of the points raised Anyway, I've said my piece - what do others think?

Tbh, I'm at the stage with them that I can't be arsed anymore. They don't listen. So there's no point.

Dear Auto Trader What on earth have you done? Back in the rosy, halcyon days of last summer, we (YOUR paying customers) were able to advertise our stock on your website by adding some simple details via your Dealer Portal. Other than a few minor adjustments via tick boxes to optional extras, the specification that was displayed to the car buying public (OUR paying customers) was sufficiently accurate to ensure that the full details of each and every car was displayed properly. Whilst we have grumbled about the prices you charge, we understood that a premium product had a cost attached and, in the absence of a credible alternative with the market share you have, we reluctantly kept handing over the cash. Albeit safe in the knowledge that you would provide us (again, YOUR paying customers) with leads that, subject to our varying abilities and skills, would lead us to a profitable sale. Then you went and spoilt everything. You made two important changes that have seriously damaged your credibility and made our lives a whole lot more difficult. Firstly, you, without warning, switched your supplier of vehicle data. Secondly, you offered the car-buying public (remember: OUR paying customers) ‘valuations’ on everything – their cars, our cars, your mum’s car, everything. Now, in order to advertise a car, what used to take a couple of minutes takes an eternity. The model/derivative descriptions and standard/optional specification you (via Glass) offer for huge numbers of vehicles is, quite frankly, rubbish. I won’t go into details about just how bad it is, because we already know – and you should already know. Despite many complaints and demands for action, you have, as yet, done nothing to rectify it. We have been told that you hope to have it sorted by Easter. Six months after making the change. I know that this will not happen. I suspect that you know this will not happen. But still you persist. I do not believe that Glass have the necessary resources in place to provide you with what you thought you were getting. It is difficult to understand why you took this hugely erroneous step of changing your vehicle data supplier from CAP to Glass. Surely somebody must have checked that the accuracy and level of detail was adequate? I can only assume it was a cost-cutting exercise but, with the gift of hindsight (available for tuppence a bucket, don’t you know), you must now realise what a dreadful decision it was. And you’ve signed up for ten years!! Seriously? And the ‘Valuations’… Words almost fail me. Almost. We are Motor Trade Professionals. It is our job to buy and sell vehicles. We do it quite a lot and have done for a very long time. We know how to value a vehicle. At no time did we specifically ask you to tell our customers how much we might have paid for the car that they are looking to buy. Especially, and this is the nub, when the information you provide is spectacularly wrong and based upon a misguided view of the marketplace, using flawed data. I am not interested in how you think you are helping our customers by providing ‘transparency’. I didn’t ask you to do this and it provides no benefit in reality to your customers (remember? US). It creates confusion, distrust and, ultimately, costs us business. Therefore, as I am YOUR customer, I am asking you to stop. I do not want you to do this for me. I am not paying you to do this. I can do it for myself if I wish to. So pack it in. You have received many, many complaints about both of the above changes; complaints which you have not addressed satisfactorily and/or ignored completely. Nobody in a senior position in your organisation has had the guts to go public and admit you might have got it wrong. You are just continuing at full speed down this dead-end street, disregarding the opinions and feelings of your customers. When will you understand how wrong and stupid that is? The final insult you have thrown at us is your decision to increase your charges (in many cases disguised within new ‘packages’). Frankly, this really is a Right Royal P**stake. You have decided, in amongst all this, that you feel justified in charging us more for a substantially worse product. Your justification for this I would really love to hear. Or maybe I wouldn’t, as I wouldn’t believe a word of it anyway. I am not alone with these thoughts. There are others who are too busy or are unable or unwilling to raise their head and voice their complaints. There will also be many who consider progress has to happen, whatever the cost. And that I should stop whinging and flog some motors. However, you have abused your position of market dominance and are taking your customers for granted. This is foolish and must stop. I, and many others, are seeking alternative ways of marketing our products and we will not hesitate in pulling the plug on you as soon as possible if nothing changes. It strikes me that you won’t necessarily give a chuff about that, as you see yourselves as being able to afford a bit of a bleed from the subscriber base, as ‘we need you more than you need us’. Apparently. Don’t cover your eyes for too long though…

I didn't mean you, specifically Max, so sorry if it looked like that. I was aiming it at those who may consider it as the way forward. And I think they're going to need a lot more than a bit of luck!

I think you forgot the word 'some' from the beginning. Anyway, the majority of Motor Traders do not want to buy part exchanges online. Besides, we are talking about Used cars, not TV's or shoes or cases of nasty wine or 45 minutes on a bouncy castle. The fundamental difference is that ALL of our products are different from all of the others. So they need to be seen to be compared properly. And that's before you consider the Distance Selling Regulations and how that impacts us, too. And Max, the more you reduce the Overheads and start competing on price, the less money you make, the more you have to cut costs to keep afloat, the more you have to sell so you'll need more staff de da, de da, de da. Shortcut to the Bankruptcy court. Good luck with that.

Heart warming indeed and I'm sure many of us have (and would) do similar things when we can. But maybe not get so lucky with the PR afterwards. ...not sure the original quote for £600 to repair a bumper scuff was quite so cardiologically toasty though, but we'll just skip that bit.

So, you found an abandoned passenger in a p/x and then removed the underwear....?

3 months into the 'new' system and the cracks are now showing. Refunds going to the wrong people, cars being 'untaxed' with nobody knowing, customers driving 'untaxed' cars that have actually been taxed, fines for not SORNing a car that didn't need it... There will be more. It is obviously flawed. But it will not be fixed as the DVLA are in denial, so we just have to keep stumbling from one cock-up to the the next, putting out the fires as we go. What have we learned? Do not offer to process the yellow slip for a p/x on behalf of the previous keeper. Ever. The one time you do, is the one time it will all go Pete Tong. Guaranteed. If you tax a car online for (or with) a customer, take a screen print of the confirmation. And get an Email too. If you do it at the Post Office, ask for 2 copies of the receipt for that transaction (session report?) showing reg no, amount paid, date etc. Give one to the customer and keep one. And don't throw out the unused tax disc holders yet.....

Damned if you do.... Damned if you don't. Perfect.

And who's expected to clear up all the mess afterwards? Nobody in Swansea is going to take one for the team, are they? I won't say I told you so.......yet.

I guess the answer to my question is Yes. Oh well, I'll just suck it up and crack on then.

Picked up a bit over the weekend. Could do without a prolonged cold period though. Have been having an interesting chat with a senior bod from a well-known valuation supplier. Seems they are very wary of values for the next few months because of the impending massive glut of PCP returns from end Feb onwards. The advice is if you have these sort of cars in stock - get 'em gone as quick as poss as there's many many more coming and values can only go one way. You may have some very expensive local landmarks on your forecourt in the summer otherwise. eg Last year Kia had around 4000 PCP returns. This year, they are expecting 12000! Not sure if the market has the capacity.

Yeah, that's Fronting, which is illegal. But you can have anyone as a named driver, as long as they are not the Primary User. However, a Trade Policy that states the trader has to be the keeper as well as the owner of any vehicle is a strange thing indeed. I'm hoping it's an exception rather than the beginning of a trend. It will also make having loan cars on Contract Hire a bit difficult too.

weirdo

hmmm. Time for a new insurance company, methinks. If you have to be the registered keeper to be insured, then it isn't a Trade policy.

Yes, but the world is their lobster, not ours, at the moment. WBAC will certainly give them a rude awakening with the PX 'valuation', but it will also give them a 'valuation' on ours too, so their perceived price to change is still unrealistic. And then they tell everyone our cars are too dear.