I had a 60+ year old twat in today. Came with his daughter who was lovely who wanted a car for her son.
Bare in mind I've spent half an hour getting the snow off the best I could, and the pipes are frozen so I can't jet wash it.
He's a bit funny from the off then says "so, can we take it out for a drive?"
"Yeah, sure"
"What do we do about the tax?"
"We have trade plates"
"Yeah, but it won't have tax"
"That's why I'll put trade plates in"
"But the tax won't be valid"
"... there are these plates, they are the tax, they mean that the car can be on the road for demo purposes, they are also connected to our insurance. You will be legal"
"Oh, yeah, I knew that"
"Well, I don't think you did... you asked three times"
"I was only winding you up"
"Right. Why?"
"I did know about them. I know all about trade plates IM EX MOTOR TRADE WAS IN IT FOR 26 YEARS" (Now I know we have a Grade-A wanker)
Me: "Yeah, I knew you were ex motor trade"
Him: "How did you know that? (I knew he wouldn't resist asking why, because he's the typical attention seeking narcissistic know it all car sales wanker - you know the sort.)
Me: "Everyone else here's normal" As I walked away to get the plates I sensed that I had dropped the perfect insult, self deprecating and insulting to him and nothing he could say back. I even heard an "Oh" as they realised what I meant.
This clearly damaged his ego. After the test drive he then told me I could've made a better job of the door shuts and under the bonnet. I was seriously considering telling him to fuck off... the equivalent of you've missed a spot mate... yeah, cheers. Instead I just looked at his daughter, made a face, she looked back sympathetically and I ignored the rest of his questions. He also tried to tell me a wheel bearing was on the way out. He daughter said "it's fine, it's spot on, don't bother checking it".
He rubbed his hands together and said "right, what will you knock off then?" Nothing. Nowt.
Full price. Paid. Piss off. I would have done the daughter a discount to be fair, but it was mum's and by association that twats money.
Off he drove, in his rusty 52 plate Saxo. Draped in his knock off burberry scarf. Did well off them two Renault dealerships you had didn't you mate?